Just here on Boort Coffee shop with so much running through my head – doubts, questions, struggles, confusion, apathy, distraction, numbness, emptiness. None of it really helpful to the cause here. Yet does God have a higher purpose? Is there a reason for it all? Will good come out of it?
Cos I’m a little low on hope, excitement or passion. How can I escape this cloud? And assuming I can in the next day or two, what happens when I get back to
Amazing Love!
How can it be? That you my king would die for me…
I know it’s true, it’s my joy to honour you, in all I do!
You’re an amazing God!! Somehow, somewhere… you are with me through all this. Watching over me, loving me, yearning… desiring that I understand what I need to, quickly learning what you’re teaching so that we can move on.
Father help me process this stuff and escape the floating junk.
All kinds of thoughts flying around at the moment
- what do I do when I feel apathetic and low on passion? Is that just a problem of our society that I need to learn to break out of? Do I need to stir up my own desire and passion when it lacks?
Discontentment breaks down apathy - How do I lead people when I feel empty and disconnected? Can I honestly and genuinely lead others when I don’t seem to be hearing from God? How does that work? Should I just concentrate on serving?
- Loneliness. Like no one really understands me or my perspective. My world centers on the spiritual, how do I live amongst people whom that doesn’t seem to be their reality. When my spiritual world is a mess, how am I supposed to cope in the physical world?
- And how do I effectively live in the spiritual realms, while bringing that back to the physical world? How can I communicate from one to the other? How can I show people clearly what God is saying? How can I share vision?
- How do I break free of the depression of those around me: my mum, and our general society that seems so lost, broken, lifeless, shallow.
Don’t copy their attitudes or thoughts, be separate, be holy, walk a different path. Get close to God before anything else, find purpose in him, don’t search for fulfillment in anything else. HE is the only hope for escaping darkness and depression. HE is the light, HE is the source of life. THE WAY, THE TRUTH, THE LIFE. Praise him. - Attraction, desire, longing for a partner, a close friend that I can live with, love and be close to, intimate. And how do I cope when that seems out of reach? Trust, not clinging or striving or manufacturing. God is in control and knows the person that will fit me. His design and timing, not mine.
Lord God… I so desperately need you. I cry out for you! I’m alone without you; naked; inadequate; lost. Please draw me close to you, bring me back to what we had a few months ago. Please shake off these doubts, the lies of the enemy and every foreign thought or attitude that is not of you. God help me win this battle of my mind.
Jesus, you reign! You are victorious, you will carry me through, you will rescue me from the storm, the waves crashing around me. Lord, on you I will stand, and on you I will prevail. No weapon formed against me shall prosper. Because you are Lord of all, no power matches yours, no one can raise an argument or force against you. On your command the nations bow, all forces of evil tremble.
You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord blessed be your name
Turn back to praise
When the darkness closes in Lord,
Still I will say
Blessed be your name!
I bless and praise your glorious name Lord Jesus. Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God almighty!!!
- Waiting upon the Lord… How do I act when I need to wait upon God?
- Those that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They will fly high on wings like eagles, they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not faint. – Isaiah 40:31
- Serving. Perhaps as I wait, and when I’m not spiritually whole, I just need to continually serve. Press on, even without feeling like it.
- But diligently wait upon God. Long, unhurried time in his presence. Silence. Pouring out thoughts, feelings. Offering pain into the loving hands of God.
PRAISE HIM….
He is holy!!
1 comment:
Does it bother you when I constantly make fun of you? It kind of just occurd to me that maybe I wasnt really building you up by picking on you or your car. By the way i think you're an awesome leader and I have ALWAYS loved having you around and leading. I think that in your weakness, His power is made perfect. I can relate to the closer you get to God the harder it is to find someone who has your perspective. I think thats why I like to hang out with you.
So put on the full armour of God and pray hard. God bless ya
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